( Me, dropping my daughter off at Pioneer Girl Camp today. I am cornered by a mom I do not know.)
Other Pioneer Mom: How are you?
Me: Oh my God, will I be glad when this heat breaks tomorrow. I was not meant to sweat. I need to move further north.
Pioneer Mom: I know. I've been upset all morning.
Me: Uuuuuh...yeah. I don't follow.
Pioneer Mom: Climate change! This heat wave is a direct result. And I see all these people in Lakewood taking out trees and I think, "This is all YOUR FAULT! Trees lower the overall ambient temperature! So thank your neighbors!
Me: (Don't laugh at her. Obviously the heat has her mental.) Hmmm... imagine if Lakewood had no pavement? Just dirt roads. That's good for a degree or two, huh?
Pioneer Mom: Exactly! And blacktop is the worst! And more trees! That would solve the global warming crisis. But people don't care.
Me: And houses. Imagine if there were no houses. How many more degrees would that be? It'd be like Finland here. (grinning)
Pioneer Mom: Climate change is a serious issue. I was being serious.
Me: I'm sorry. You're right.
...and I walked away, trying to look ashamed of myself, as she stared at me with narrowed eyes, indignant and green. (And definitely sustainable, local and organic. Lol.)
I actually had this conversation today. The social laws of my daughter's pioneer day camp required that I stand there and listen to this shit. And aren't you proud of me? I think I'm making social progress! I nearly made it through the whole damn conversation without making a snide remark! Very nearly!
~dana
